A Few Pages from the Diary of Allegra Segreti
by Mandy2
Summary: AU: Slytherin Ginny's roommate and friend candidly talks politics, family, Quidditch, and the changing world, all with Ginny in focus.


Disclaimer: I own only the situations and characters which are not owned by Ms. Rowling. Although this is most certainly an AU, you'll notice most of the major plot points have made it in there (PoA, GoF, OotP, HBP).

* * *

This is the diary of Allegra Segreti. If you've managed to read that much, I'm clearly not as clever as I thought I was. Or maybe you're very, very clever. Or maybe—dear Morgana, Allegra, will you get to the point?

Huh.

I sounded like my mum a bit there.

I am a member of the Slytherin house, class of 1999. While my ancestors do not derive from the fourteen founding families of England, I am the result of what happens when an entire generation of eligible bachelorettes finds themselves quite without an acceptable male counterpart. This was particularly a problem in the 70s, naturally. It is always a problem at a time of war.

After all, do Segretti, Zabini, Lestrange, or Malfoy sound very English to you? Then again, the French Malfoys immigrated in the times of Grindewald. My grandmother was Araminta Crouch-Melifula, whose daughter Alexandrina Melifula married my father Anastasio Segreti. If only the Potters and the Weasleys and the Prewetts and the Longbottoms and the Crouches and the McMillans could understand politics better.

Speaking of the Weasleys and the Prewetts, eventually, English pure witches get sick of foreign husbands and merely overlook a misstep in the past. How else did the Rookwoods reemerge?

Of course, one always has to repent. And in these matters, penance is usually far more easily granted when the foundations are set.

Which brings me back to the Weasleys and the Prewetts. Oh, they were perhaps the greatest loss to the fertility of the pure. Such a stock of pureblooded men wasted on… well, I'll not pretend to know much more than what my parents tell me. Which makes me a little bit better, doesn't it?

I keep getting distracted! Right, so anyway, the Weasleys and the Prewetts have long since produced the proud, the noble, the golden Gryffindors. Another shame that you know, could be overlooked, but politically speaking they've just been… ALLEGRA! There. Let me say it before I forget to.

My roommates are the following: Selena Capper, Jessenia Dorny, Xanthia Rosier, and Ginevra Weasley.

That's right, you read correctly. I suppose now that I've gone on and on about politics and blood and whatnot that you understand the gravity of that girl's presence in the house of the serpent. There, that's my justification for my rambling.

We, of course, were all shocked. And, I might add, it took some getting used to. But the elder students reminded bullies, a Crabbe or a Malfoy or two, that the war had diminished the pure, both male _and_ female, and unless they wanted to learn more languages, it would do them well to appreciate a branch of English pure that hadn't been tapped by the discriminating in a long time.

My cousin, who was then a fourth year by the name of Barrett Montague (but we all call him Monty) has always been Ginny's protector of sorts. Though shy and withdrawn around her family, and particularly her family's friends if you know what I mean, Ginny's true tempestuous side didn't initially take too kindly to this treatment. And, quite frankly, we girls still weren't taking too kindly to the redheaded blood traitor we shared closet space with.

Monty begged me to talk to her, which at that point I thought was just useless seeing as we weren't friends yet.

But in case you haven't noticed yet, family is very important in the Slytherin house.

So I convinced the girls to be nice to Ginny. At first, she wasn't exactly endearing, but can you blame her? Separated from her family in a house that hated her with roommates who hadn't talked to her for the first couple of months. By November, Ginny was more receptive to Monty's advances.

Just in time for Quidditch season. Oh, Quidditch, I finally made it to another of my points! And Segreti scores!

So things slowed down for Ginny and Monty for a while, which I think was probably best. Meantime, I had someone to translate for me as we both faithfully followed the Slytherin Quidditch team.

Now, don't call me an expert on feelings or anything (you weren't even close to trying, were you?), but Quidditch seemed to be the catalyst for all problems Slytherin Ginny/Gryffindor every other Weasley. I first noticed this during the first match between one of Ginny's bullies, Draco Malfoy, and her brother's best friend, Harry Potter.

We were twelve and I now well realize we had no idea what we were talking about, but we girls compared to two Seekers' potential after the game in our room.

When it came Ginny's turn, she was oddly quiet. I mean, we all tried to understand. We of all people knew the importance of family ties but when Xanthia cleared her throat, Ginny broke out into a smile, a smirk really, and said that, to be honest, if he weren't such an arse to her, she preferred Draco any day.

"The chins in that family." Jessenia whispered to Selena, I remember. Oh, the two of them were so very conspiratorial.

Anyhow, that's my first recollection of Quidditch-related friction.

You know, I really can't see how I, who can barely understand the mere concepts of Chasers and Keeper, am spending so much bloody time discussing it—oh, yes, that's right, the scandal, oh the scandal. But I will get to it, I suppose. I'm very easily distracted, don't you see?

It was not a good year for Slytherin Quidditch. Our captain, Marcus Flint, failed his N.E.W.Ts, but fortunately was to be allowed an additional year to try again. And there was that whole losing thing. Monty blames it on lack of practice, and even on our head of house Professor Snape because apparently the professor had received warning of Marcus' potential failure and had forced Marcus to practice less, or worse, at hours during which no professor could expect Marcus to be able to concentrate. Naturally, this took its toll on the team, and, well, that's the boys' explanation of a terrible season. Though they really ought not to have blamed it on me, I was merely trying to trace the strain on Ginny and Monty's young relationship to its rightful source.

You know, Theodore Nott says I could be a very valuable spy if I didn't get so hung up on gossip, which he calls trifling details. Then again, he can't explain what's going on these days either, or where it came from, so take _that_ Theodore Nott.

Quite naturally, while Monty was off sulking or bullying other, usually younger and harmless people, Ginny became great friends with the less Quidditch-obsessed male members of the house. She told Xanthia and I it was, she supposed, an effort to make up for the brothers she'd "practically lost", as well as an effort to talk Quidditch to people she didn't have to translate it for. I can't say I didn't appreciate it; after all, as long as she nudges me when I'm supposed to cheer or boo, my passion for the game is quite fulfilled.

That year, Oliver Wood had gotten his only cup. Oh, but if he'd asked for it, I'm sure plenty of girls would've been willing to give it to him.

Anyhow, her friends were boys in our year, but she also expanded the circle. Blaise Zabini eventually took to her (I think Xanthia might've leaked Ginny's preference for Malfoy over Potter, which was a much needed boost to Ginny's popularity in the house. Or did I do that? I never can remember—oh yes, Xanthia reminded me just yesterday; she did it because I didn't want to incense Monty's jealousy. That's right. Anyway…) after he accepted her, and Theodore Nott thought her to be intensely clever, which I suppose she is. I mean, I do copy a lot of her homework, but that's because she does it and… ooh a puppy!

* * *

I tend to get distracted, have you noticed that yet?

* * *

So by and by time progressed, and in our second year, Monty became a lot more attentive to Gin, seeing as her friends in third year could now woo her with things from Hogsmeade. He even managed to get a spot for Gin on the reserve team, despite Marcus's blatant sexism. She practiced mostly as a Chaser, I think I remember, but when that horrible beast attacked Draco, Ginny was asked to play Seeker, debuting for the first time against Gryffindor.

Now, here this, my Quidditch references have been detailed thus far because these have been the most pivotal to Ginny's alienation from her family. I can't make any promises, and don't you ask me to!

Huh… that was my feminist side, sorry. This particular match incites that in me, in the tiny bits of all of us, I suppose. No girl had ever played for the Slytherin team ever. And it was the first match in the entire season! And Sirius Black was on the loose and we were all at our wits' ends… especially Ginny, who would be playing her first ever game against her family's house and against her brother's best friend.

I remember Ginny saying something to Xanthia and I about the previous summer having been the second summer in a row that Potter had spent time with her family. She didn't mention breaks much, I guess due to the increasing tension in her otherwise tightly knit family, but she found that bit of trivia to be worth mentioning. And although he stopped himself from saying it in front of her, as her sensitivity about it and her resulting temper already well known, Blaise Zabini remarked that it was only further proof that the Potters were blood traitors too.

It was a thunderstorm, I remember, and someone mentioned seeing a Grim, but the important thing was that Ginny, undistracted by the large dog and pride forcing her to tough everything out, caught the Snitch.

That act alone triggered so very much. I'll try to stay on track and cover everything in a succinct manner (I almost spelled that correctly the first time! Score number two for Segreti!)

Firstly, the Weasleys had to pretend to be happy for their beloved sister, and the twins, oh the twins, I've nearly forgotten them. Well, perhaps because up until now they never had any tensions with their mischievous sister, whom they'd like to think takes after them. Oh, hardly. Ron and Percy, on the other hand, were not so gracious and were even less so when it turned out that Ginny's aid to Slytherin victory catalyzed the Slytherins winning the season, and naturally (is it so naturally? Is that how it works?) the Quidditch cup.

Dare I say it but even Harry Potter was gracious about his loss. Perhaps he had more important things on his mind—oh right, those Dementors. I always forget. And dare I say it, but Ginny's victory, in light of the fact that Harry Potter hadn't actually lost to his rival, Draco, and in light of the fact that Ginny preferred skill over cunning (unlike our captain), struck a cord with the Boy-Who-Lived. I dare say it, oh, I dare say it, but this match might've been the beginning of Potter's crush on Ginny.

The opposite was true with Draco. While Ginny's victory overflowed into the other games, the other games with Draco flying as the Seeker, which led Draco to the championship game, Draco couldn't accept this hand-me-down of glory and the pair started an intense rivalry, which probably comforted poor Monty, as he had finally opened his eyes to see that while he obsessed over Quidditch, Ginny had non-brotherly "brothers" entertaining her, most of whom were Draco's age.

There, I think I've covered everything. About that game, at least.

Oh, and two years later, at the beginning of Monty's captainship, despite Monty seeing Daphne Greengrass, beginning about Yule Ball our third year, Ginny had herself a secured spot on the Slytherin line-up, being the first girl ever to do so.

* * *

And although I'm dying to go into Yule Ball that year, I'll give you the quick details. Selena went with Blaise Zabini and they both wore shades of white, very striking on Blaise, not so much on Selena. Washed her out a bit. Blaise hated Selena and regretted not asking Ginny before Theodore had, and ended up spending the whole night at our table while Selena and Jessenia bitched to the Patil twins, who were in similar situations. Jessenia went with Adrian Pucey and they both wore silver, and silver went surprisingly well with Jessenia's coloring, I hate to say. Xanthia wore blue and went with a Beauxbatons boy, and I went with Miles Bletchley and convinced him to wear a very deep purple (it was the only shade he'd compromise to!) to offset my vivid purple robes.

Xanthia and I chipped in and bought Ginny these lovely emerald green robes for Christmas.

Oh, money! I've forgotten to mention it! Oh, well, I suppose it will come up. It always does, you know.

* * *

So… our fourth year. As though anyone had any other reason to avoid Harry Potter, now everybody thought he was crazy. Or, as Draco put it, now everybody agreed that he was crazy. And that year, of all years, was the tensest yet when it came to Quidditch. First of all, Draco and Ginny were constantly fighting, and Ginny was especially cutting about Draco's Seeking skills (or, as she once said, the fact that he ought to be seeking skills! Ha! You get it? I know, it took me a while too!). I can't say I disagree, but mostly because Ginny provides me with my Quidditch opinions.

Second of all, that year, Ginny's brother Ron, the one that was especially irked by her previous season's success, began playing for the Gryffindor team, and worse, he was in the position directly opposite Ginny's. Or at least I think he was.

* * *

All right, I'm back. Theodore says that Keeper _is_ directly opposite Chasers, as his job is to make sure the Chasers don't score. Right-o then.

Anyhow, the twins were still there, and even though their captain barked orders to massacre the other team, they knew full well that being responsible for Ginny's injuries on the pit would result in death by Howler poisoning from their mum. So, needless to say (well, actually there is a need to say it seeing as I didn't understand this much until Monty explained it to me), the lack of Bludgers aimed at the Slytherins made the game a lot easier for them, in addition to the lack of goalkeeping skills on the Gryffindor side, and the excess of talent in our offensive (is it the offense? I can never tell which line is the defense and which is the offensive) line. Draco's lack of skill; however, cost them the game by mere points, which insured quite the interesting championship match, as with Ginny's assistance for the Slytherins, and Potter's assistance for the Gryffindors, both teams were on top.

Against the other teams, Draco did just fine. But Potter, believe it or not, is an actually good Seeker, good enough to make me pay attention, anyway. Ginny gushed to me and Xanthia that Monty was considering putting Ginny in for the championship game, long before the season was secure. Monty was talking about this in the locker rooms in January.

The upsides, I remember, were simple. No Bludgers, no real Keeper, and Ginny's skill.

Ginny only told us this after we demanded an explanation for the increased amount of fighting between Draco and Ginny. I mean, it was getting to be a hassle. They were quarantined at the Slytherin table in the Dining Hall because nobody wanted to get in the way of them kicking and hexing each other under the table, which naturally made Pansy, Draco's girlfriend, unhappy. And boy, when that bitch gets made, we get to hearing about it. And hearing about it, and hearing about it…

Worse for Ginny, her family of boys were forced to side with Draco, seeing as they "shared a room with the prat" as she hotly explained it one evening. She told us that although she loved us dearly—

And I remembered thinking we could never replace the family that replaced hers. And we all knew how important family was.

Sometime in March; however, there was a noticeable shift. Ginny resumed visits to Hogsmeade, for one thing. I remember she'd stopped for a while… when Monty broke up with her and when the boys had sided with Draco and Ginny didn't take hand-outs from us girls, seeing as she certainly couldn't repay us the way they thought she'd repay them, but then she began again. First she said she had gotten a job at Gladrags, which thrilled us because not only could she have a discount to keep up with us, but also she was getting paid and would have a sneak peek at all the latest fashions before they hit the storefront.

But that wasn't it. Ginny and Draco began tolerating one another in the Common Room and at the dinner table. No longer were any of us worried about them killing one another or anybody else, for that matter. Sometimes, they'd even disappear, though Pansy insisted that Draco was merely fulfilling his duties as an Inquisitorial Squad member and a prefect. She made no excuses for Ginny's absences.

Now, before you get carried away, let me tell you about April. In April, the boys of the house were particularly stressed because; since it had been leaked about Monty's potential plans to substitute Ginny, there had been no updates on the state of the team. Sure, Draco was winning against Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, but he had before. And sure, Potter had been tossed off his team, as had the Beaters, but Ginny's other brother, Ron, had been improving.

It was in April that Monty nearly exploded trying to convince Ginny to play in the game and she'd quietly said something (to the effect of, he's been improving, I later learned), and when Monty gave Draco's progress good thought, he wanted to know where it had come from and when he found out, he declared loudly, "Why, I could kiss you, Ginevra Weasley!"

Which naturally put Daphne in a snit, even after she heard that Ginny had been privately tutoring Draco. This fact did; however, cool Pansy down, and when the Slytherins won the Cup for the second year in a row, we were all excessively happy.

It was during exams that the plot thickened further. Draco's parents had been dually informed of his victory, and although Mrs. Malfoy said it pleased his father, she also said he had duties to fulfill and was presently to preoccupied to have a discussion with Draco.

So many ears were pressed to the fifth year boys' dorm that evening, as Draco was told of the variety of roles women have played in our society. She gave examples. One she compared to little old me, a highly observant if not flighty witch whose name I cannot remember who was awfully good at picking up things at the Hog's Head… which, disgusting as it may sound was highly profitable. Hmmm…

Anyhow, she compared Pansy to herself and she said that if Draco's success were to be more like his father's, he could do just fine with a girl like Pansy, who stood aside and let things run their course. Theodore Nott; for example, could do with a girl like Pansy.

I believe both Theodore and Pansy stormed off at this point, and they missed the most interesting part.

Mrs. Malfoy said that Draco needed someone to light his fire, as did his Uncle Rodolphus. It was easy, she said, to lose sight of the big picture without someone to help focus his passions, like his Aunt Bellatrix.

It was then when Mrs. Malfoy segued back into that bloody Quidditch, that perplexing game, and Draco's recent victory. She remarked on his improvement and there, after a long pause, was where the conversation ended. We heard the pair rise and scurried upstairs to Miles' dorm, which was then cleared out, by me, for some, well, personal business.

* * *

The game had other long-term effects on Ginny, ones more direct and biting than Pansy could ever bring herself to be. Her twin brothers had been booted off their team and had later left school as a result, leaving her with only her brother Ron—her on-the-pitch rival and opposite—for family ties. And Potter had even shouted at her for mercy against her brother in the final game—their interaction of which can only be referred to as a spanking, according to Miles—and her lack there of apparently was the final straw for the Gryffindors. They were through with trying to keep things friendly with her.

But what did Ginny care, right? She'd gotten her other brothers back, the ones that understood her cleverness and cunning, her smirks and saunters.

That summer Ginny begged to be allowed to stay with Xanthia or me. But Xanthia was the daughter of a known Death Eater, and even the excuse of staying in Naples with me for the summer and becoming cultured didn't convince her parents, who by then were staying somewhere other than their home, Xanthia said, as she'd tried to visit. Xanthia told me after having a rare lunch with Ginny in London that wherever Ginny was, she was nearly miserable, being away from her friends and alienated by most of her family.

And her parents' insufferable guests—she'd only name two, two of which Xanthia and I were already very familiar. Hermione Granger was an insufferable, Mudblood know-it-all who didn't have enough estrogen to suffice as a girlfriend in Ginny's most desperate of days, and the other was Harry Potter, who, although he disrespected everything she stood for and considered her merciless and heartless (she retaliated that Ron had never treated her well once she'd made the Slytherin line-up and apparently he dropped the subject), practiced with her.

This was a blessing in disguise. Sure, Ron was no real competition for his sister in the Quidditch department, but then again, as a Keeper, neither was Harry. But they both got better at both of their positions. Ginny even found herself repeating some of the same routines she'd developed with Draco when she tutored him during the school year, because they were good practice for Harry, and gave him real competition, which increased his desire to catch the Snitch.

Xanthia brought up an excellent point, I think, when she said to Ginny that did she really want to assist our rival Seeker?

Ginny replied that it was merely an exchange, business. A favor for a favor. And Xanthia and I concluded that if Potter helped keep our star Chaser in shape, she could be generous enough to do the same for him.

It was then that Xanthia brought up Draco Malfoy, whose father had recently been imprisoned for his involvement at the Ministry, and with whom Harry Potter's rivalry had only grown exponentially.

Naturally, being with her family had decreased Ginny's contact with Draco. Merlin, Ginny barely got to see any of her friends. And to spend more time with Draco's greatest rival than her own brother (purely circumstantial, Ginny had said hotly) didn't help at all. But despite the odds, Draco and Ginny's friendship increased in its own awkward, gangly sort of way.

Ginny never wrote it but told me even, as the Inquisitorial Squad got more fervent the previous year and as the retaliation did as well, that she did not know her own politics. She'd been raised the Weasley and Prewett way, not to hate anybody, despite what anybody said about them. The message had gotten through loud and clear to her, louder and clearer, she thought, than to everybody else.

For even knowing the dark reputation of our house, she wanted to make the best of it. I noticed then that she tried to make the best of everything. She'd never outright discriminated against anyone who hadn't crossed her first. She never joined in the Muggle or Gryffindor or Merlin, even the Eloise Midgen bashing. It was always her brother, or that insufferable and nosy know-it-all Granger, or Harry Potter, who ended up the subject of her diatribes. Perhaps that was what was most endearing to all the other Slytherins.

She never chastised us for our discriminations, having overcome them herself, but at the same time she never joined. One canceled out the other, I suppose.

But in spite of all this, she felt the other side led just as weakly as our own, which is to say, both had flaws. She saw Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger for what they were, both negative and positive, and couldn't join those who would eventually put her friends' parents to death, especially not for those who had alienated her so during her time at Hogwarts, a place where she'd always been left, from the beginning, defenseless and confused about her place in the world.

* * *

Oh, there… I've gotten off into another tangent. And this one hurts more, because I suppose I'm getting closer to my point. This is where, I believe, the Weasley and the Prewett emerge in Ginny. For, not yet knowing her own politics, Ginny allowed things to deepen between her and Draco.

I knew that when we returned to our fifth year at Hogwarts, Ginny had been made a prefect, like Ron and Draco and Pansy, and the title had boosted her in her suspicious mother's esteem, and had purchased her a new broomstick, which was less than top of the line and mysteriously replaced after the first Hogsmeade weekend by something much better, the latest Nimbus.

Later, with our promises and swears not to say anything, Ginny told us that Draco had taken her broom, added a few Galleons and exchanged it for a nicer model. For the team, she insisted.

Of course they'd both say that, seeing as despite his parents' urgings otherwise, Draco was still dating Pansy. But that too, looked strained. Draco had apparently rejected the captaincy that year, which infuriated Pansy, mainly because he would not explain to her why, and seemed to be in meetings with our head of house quite a bit, which worried all of us, who only had hazy memories of Flint's time in Snape's office. Perhaps it was a blessing in disguise that Draco wasn't our captain this year, for we all remember how grumpy the Slytherin team had been at that time.

Ginny was also part of the Slug Club, as though she needed any more on her plate. She and Blaise spent quite a bit of time going to all the Slug parties, and bitching about Harry Potter when they returned. Well, Blaise bitched.

But as the year progressed, more color drained from Draco's face, and he always seemed to be fighting with someone. Sometimes, it was in hushed tones with Ginny, whose eyes would flash and often times, phrases like, "Mind your own business; you seem to have a lot of it to mind!" or "Well, if you don't like it, why don't you do something about it?" rose from the whispers. Sometimes, it was with Pansy, who seemed to dominate those fights, screaming about a poor, blood-traitor family. There seemed to be no question there about the subject. Sometimes, it was even with his good friend Blaise, who barely entertained Draco's ridiculous fantasies by merely rolling his eyes. And every time Draco got into it with Harry Potter, it seemed Professor Snape was always around to scoop him out of trouble.

We were all on edge that year. It was a year to find our politics, as Ginny privately put it. After that, it was a matter of hiding our politics, either from the house or the rest of the world. Some of us, like Ginny, had become withdrawn. Some of us, like Pansy, chose to focus on the less important things in life. Some of us had taken to flying off the handle at every given opportunity. That year, Malfoy had been all of those things.

Quidditch, now more than ever, was an outlet. It was during Quidditch practices, games, and talks that Ginny and Draco could openly and comfortably bond, without judgment, or in the very least, with an excuse.

Sometimes they had prefect rounds together, but Ron and Hermione Granger tried to ensure this would never happen. They tried to ensure that Ginny was never paired with a fellow Slytherin, especially ones with known ties to Death Eaters. But they couldn't be there every time, and they couldn't object to every pairing. This was the one they most fought against, so their prefect rounds were rare.

Ginny told us on the same night she explained about her better broom, which her brother had yet to notice, that sometimes Draco would pay the other prefect either to exchange with him quietly or to quietly allow him to tag along. He didn't bother trying with the Gryffindor prefects, but oftentimes, this would work, and Ginny and Draco seemed so much more comfortable with one another as the year went by. It was such a change from the previous year.

This, of course, went awry. Perfect things always tend to, don't they? That's why I've never cared for romance novels, no matter how much Jessenia and Selena promise me they're realistic. Xanthia says she was named after a character in a romance novel—

Oh, I've done it again, haven't I? I'm sorry.

Anyhow, as I was saying, eventually Pansy, Ron, and Hermione got wind of the bribes. The explosions in the common room followed.

"Pansy, you know how much stress I'm under and there are two times when I find myself at peace—when I'm flying and when I talk to Ginny. And the two just don't overlap enough!"

Pansy dipped into her usual, unoriginal bag of tricks, spewing trash about Ginny's family. But for once, she had something interesting to say at the end of it.

"What you'll be asking of her is something she has yet to do—cut ties with her family entirely. And even if she does it, Draco, she'll hate you for it and you'll hate yourself for it. And that's what both of you deserve to live with for the rest of your lives!"

And I know sometime around that time, Ginny and Draco started becoming intimate.

* * *

By now you've probably figured out that Ginny and Xanthia and I aren't as close as we've been in previous years. Perhaps that's due to the fact that by now, Xanthia and I… or really Xanthia, to be completely honest… oh, there I go with the superfluous details… Anyhow, Xanthia gets Quidditch now and she explains. There's more to it, I suppose. Ginny's family had never been keen on her spending time with us outside of school, but I guess that… all of that got more urgent after what happened at the Ministry.

By the time the incident at the Ministry had occurred, the people in our house had accepted Ginny despite her background. I suppose many people had forgotten it, except for at Quidditch time, and even then she was spared. But the war made us all more alert, about our politics I suppose. And we were all reminded, I guess, who Ginny was and where Ginny came from.

I guess Ginny tried to forget in these times, and forgetting was the best thing she could've done, really, in retrospect. Because when she tried to keep things like nothing had changed, nobody had any ammunition against her. I mean, everybody noticed she was quieter, but it terms of politics, she'd always been that way. So in essence, in the most delicate forum, she was safe.

It was sometime when Ginny and Draco had become more intimate—past snogging, Xanthia and I knew, but not quite the whole nine—that Ginny had become even more withdrawn. Something told me that Draco's stress and her deepening silence were not coincidental.

And of all things, the very subject that had so incensed the flames within the Weasley family (and I do not mean that pun lightly) had been in a sense put on the back burner, for the sake of continued metaphor. It soothed and urged the couple, certainly, but most importantly, Quidditch served as a distraction from politics. On the field, it could be as it had always been, Slytherin versus Gryffindor, for the sake of rivalry.

I mean, the irony doesn't escape me that it was this prejudice against Muggleborns and vice versa, against Dark magic, that sparked the rivalry in the first place. But there on the field, we could all pretend that it was just a tradition.

And it was wonderful for that. For that I would've… for that I would've tried harder to understand. But I saw the faces, of both the Weasleys, of Harry Potter, of Draco Malfoy. It didn't do the same things for them anymore, and that was the tragedy of growing up in these times. They couldn't chase those dreams, even if they really had ever wanted to, for they were meant for something bigger.

* * *

Slytherin won the Quidditch Cup, but mostly because only Draco and Ginny seemed to be totally preoccupied with politics, or in Ginny's case, lack entirely there of. Slytherins, on the other hand, were a lot more prepared in that we'd been told where we've stood the entire time and have been hiding it our entire lives, whereas the rest of the school was suffering in fear, confusion, and fighting.

And most people forgot about the Cup anyway because that year, at the end of term, the head of our house murdered our headmaster.

Immediately afterward, Draco disappeared, and it was thought best not to ask Ginny or Pansy or anyone terribly close to him, but everyone suspected his connection to the murder. After all, he'd long since been a favored student of our head of house and had frequent meetings with him throughout the school year, and even outside of the house he wasn't quick to deny his father's involvement with the Death Eaters and his similar mindset.

And the disappearance thing wasn't fishy at all either.

* * *

That was the worst summer for Ginny. She was barely allowed to owl us and she certainly wasn't going to explain what (if anything) she knew. What she did say was that even the shallow shell of understanding Hermione and Ron had of whatever it was that Ginny and Draco meant to one another was enough to have her grounded to that same unknown location in London for yet another summer with the Mudblood know-it-all, a family who barely pretended not to hate her, and Harry Potter.

It was about this time that Ginny started to use words like blood traitors or Mudbloods in her letters. They were always crossed out of course, but, desperate for any other signs from our good friend, Xanthia and I convinced Blaise, who'd come of age and passed his test, to perform magic and read.

It turns out that Ginny had been writing in invisible ink, a potion recipe she had acquired from a tattered textbook she found in Harry's room, underneath all of her seemingly innocent letters. The cross-outs were merely to spark our curiosity, which she knew it would.

It seemed that the more time she spent with her family, the more she wanted to rebel against them. They contained her, thinking that the longer they kept her away from us, her family at school, the more likely it would be that she would fight for them.

_I don't want to fight for anybody._ She wrote. _But sometimes, I just want to fight them. Not what they believe in or what they stand for, just them. I want to be in Italy with you, Allegra, or have lunch with Xanthia, or talk Quidditch with Blaise and Theodore. But I guess it can't be that simple._

Blaise told us quietly that although it had been Draco's mission to kill Professor Dumbledore, Snape had ended up doing it. Through some miracle or perhaps remarkable skill, Snape had managed to convince the Dark Lord that Draco had been rendered incapable and Snape had stepped in to finish the job. Draco's life was spared, but just that. He was forced to stay away from the Death Eaters until the investigation was over and adopt the cover that he had been under the Cruciatus Curse. It was a risk Draco had to take, being that he was a highly likely suspect seeing who his father was, and thus Veritaserum had been administered in the course of the investigation.

But the truth was what it was, and it had saved Draco. Draco had not actually murdered Professor Dumbledore, and in order to remain loyal and still useful, he had to be a safe distance away from the Dark Lord and his followers.

* * *

_He's been cleared,_ Ginny wrote in her next letter, disguised as an update on her Quidditch practices with Potter to Blaise, _But my family is still outraged that I spend time with anyone like him. I remind them that Sirius Black was, for nearly two decades, thought to be a Death Eater and even my parents believed that. Harry got really mad at me then, he wouldn't even put up a fight when we'd practice. But even he came around. He said I probably knew Draco as well as his dad had known Sirius and if there was a reason that Draco didn't kill Professor Dumbledore I probably knew it. He really overestimates me, but I suppose that's what comes with being the object of someone's affection.

* * *

_

I'm not saying I sympathize with the Order of the Phoenix or the Weasley family. I have always, frankly, been so out of it in politics that I have accepted what my family believes. Is it safe? Maybe not, but I don't have to figure it out. Perhaps this is why I'm obsessed with Ginny's struggle to understand her own politics because up until that fateful day when the Sorting Hat had screamed out what many considered entirely the wrong founder she's been forced to reevaluate everything.

I have never ever been in that position and I both envy the challenge and pity its victim.

I have, I suppose, even more pity for Ginny's family. Say they are right, politically anyway. Their hypocrisy of sorts has really only driven Ginny further into the snake pit. They raise her to follow her heart. Well, her heart says summers with Xanthia Rosier, Allegra Segreti, Blaise Zabini, Theodore Nott, and Draco Malfoy. Draco Malfoy most of all, an enemy of the Weasley family by last name alone. And they tell her it's wrong. They tell her, they show her, by every increasing year that her heart is wrong, and yet they expect it to be politically in the "right" place? Something about this deeply flawed logic, in light of all the circumstances and accidents over the years, makes me pity the Weasleys.

* * *

In light of Dumbledore's murder and Draco's corresponding clearance as a suspect, Narcissa Malfoy only further believed that Ginny Weasley was the girl from him. She came from a "good" family fighting the "good" fight and she'd always been a lowkey girl with no particular involvement in mischief at school. In fact, I dare say that there's little anyone outside of the houses of Gryffindor or Slytherin could find to say about Ginny other than the most basic facts.

And it was a remarkable cover. On top of that, it was clear that Ginny and Draco had some sort of understanding of one another.

This had become the understanding of our community, and I managed to let Ginny know, as her parents regularly watched for irregular owls, before Draco managed to track her down on the train. They'd been in the prefects' meeting, and since then, seemed to be inseparable.

Ginny had been made captain of the Slytherin Quidditch team, having been the only truly consistent member for so many years. Not only had she been their first female player, but she'd also been their first female captain. This time around, her parents didn't even pretend to be happy for her, as they knew Quidditch was a direct link to the Malfoy boy. Harry had pleaded her case for her, reminding them that they knew less about Malfoy than she did, but Ron and Hermione had only counteracted his point with all of their solid evidence, and they'd pointed out Harry's bias.

Ginny didn't like talking about the Boy Who Lived With Her Family Every Summer, and usually didn't at school. Especially not now that she was rarely out of Draco's sight.

She did offer him a great cover. Even though Ron suspected otherwise, he stamped out rumors that Ginny herself had joined the Dark, and as a result, eventually the student body believed Draco and that he had been cursed by an Unforgivable and forced to partake in a murder. By December, people almost pitied him and certainly chastised their own behavior in assuming he was just like his father. No, not if he was with the Weasley girl. He'd even settled in being cordial to Ron in the corridors. People were starting to wonder if things were getting serious between Ginny and Draco and that gossip eventually overcame the less pleasant subjects.

It was starting to get scary at Hogwarts. I mean it, really. People were already losing that zest and fervor for life and they'd stopped pretending like they still were holding on for the little things, like they had the year before.

This year; however, in an effort to remain lowkey and keep up with the images they'd always projected, Draco and Ginny launched themselves into Quidditch full force. Sure, Draco had N.E.W.Ts to study for, but he only cared to pass them at this point. He paid strict attention in his classes for what he would be going on to use, but other than that and Quidditch he didn't engage himself often in other school activities. Ginny picked up his prefect duties for him, using the time to think about strategies.

Ginny and Draco were starting to scare me, because I suppose they were my glimpse into my future. The accomplished but unmemorable Slytherin wife, supporting her Death Eater husband in all his endeavors… politic-less. Was this what I wanted?

Yes, and no. I wanted that sense of complete—complete completion they shared. They truly seemed whole in one another's presence, assisting one another, aware of the odd, formal, and aristocratic turn their modern love had taken. And sure, they had reached that point very well on their own, but was that enough for me?

Xanthia and Jessenia and Selena liked it just fine, I could tell. Xanthia wanted that from Blaise, even though it might mean working at it with Blaise, which she'd never even thought of doing. Jessenia and Matthias Harper were the same way… on a much shallower level I suppose. Selena had nobody but I liked it better that way because she deserved nobody.

As for me, I don't know what I want from Theodore. I don't know his… politics, and as much as I've tried to ignore them all these years, I need to know. He doesn't seem intent on letting me know. I guess he'd rather me assume. But I can't. I'm not that clever, you see.

I told Ginny this once as we both sat on a black marble floor in some bathroom somewhere and she said she supposed she knew how I felt. She only knew Draco's politics because he'd tried to complete a mission for the Dark Lord.

"But what about all that quiet last year?" I whispered, my face streaked with tears.

Ginny was on the verge herself, which surprised me. I guess in the past few years, I hadn't seen evidence she still _knew_ how to cry.

"That was the love part. The no questions part." She added that second part very slowly, I remember. I thought, and I remember this, that it sounded like the second part had to climb over a hill in her throat.

"So that's it, huh?" I asked, not particularly knowing what I was asking.

But Ginny nodded. Ginny knew. And in time, I understood.

* * *

A long time passed before Ginny and Draco news became important. Draco graduated a top scholar, and his last year; the Slytherins won the Cup again. Ginny passed her of age test and told her parents she loved Draco.

By this time, the damage was irreversible. Harry tried writing to her for a while, but after September 1st, when she'd headed off to Hogwarts for the last time, presumably on Draco's bill, he never saw her with the Weasleys again.

The gossip in the rags were that Ginny believed so much in Draco that she was willing to turn her back on her loving family to prove it to them. But we all saw through that, we all saw the lies. Even the parts that hurt us most. Even the Weasleys saw that.

It is still quite the scandal, you know. They're getting married in June and everybody's expecting the Weasleys to forgive their daughter in time to go to the wedding, and to bless the union. Everyone but us. I mean, even Hermione Granger and Harry Potter have their hopes up. But we—we've seen the disintegration of the Weasley family over the years.

I suppose he asked me for the very reasons I keep this diary. Confusion, clarification, curiosity, or merely out of shallowness. Theodore asked me once, though, if I thought she really did love him. Enough to be with him. Enough to believe in the Dark Lord.

And I nodded. I knew. Because this time, I understood.


End file.
